No More Band-Aids
Trauma is a wound of the mind, heart, and soul. It's usually invisible but the effects of trauma to the survivor are like bullet holes. It's impossible to fix that type of wound with a band-aid. As survivors, we try. We cover the wound but we don't treat it with the care it deserves and needs to heal. Some professionals attempt to band-aid the wound by treating only the symptoms. Band-aids last for a while, but they aren't a permanent solution.
Before Footnotes, I tried other counseling. Their solution was medication. They wanted to give me sleep-aids instead of figuring out why I was terrified to close my eyes, and what was causing the nightmares. They explained my anxiety and depression would lessen if I took mood stabilizers. They seemed to have zero interest in why I was unstable though. When we talked about my trauma we focused on what happened, and not how what happened affected me. They stopped the immediate bleeding but they didn't attempt to heal the wound.
I did my own band-aiding. I used a lot of things to try to pack those wounds. Anything to cover the wounds for a while and pretend they weren't there. Band-aids can be a plethora of things: sex, drugs, lust, marriage, kids, avoidance, other people and their problems. These things don't last though. They hide the wound for a while. They pack it, filling the void. Eventually, the band-aid gives way to the magnitude of the wound. Wounds become infected when not properly treated. The longer it goes untreated, the worse the infection gets, and the more it affects the person inflicted.
When we try to band-aid our trauma wounds instead of healing them completely, not only does it infect us deeper and more harshly, but we end up bleeding on those around us. Our wounds end up staining others. The infection comes out anywhere it’s able to because our bodies aren't meant to store that type of yuck. The only way to fix the wound is to dig into it, clean it out, clear away the fragments and infection, and stitch it up. It's a painful process. Just like any physical wound it's tender for a while, but if it's treated properly, eventually the pain lessens.
If we were talking about an actual wound that was bleeding and open, it would be a no-brainer to go to the ER and have a surgeon fix it up. Mental health and trauma are the same: it's just not always visible for the world to see. Having a professional help clean and heal the wounds of trauma is just as important as physical wounds. An infected bullet wound can kill you. So can an infected wound of the brain, heart, and soul. Your invisible wounds deserve to be healed; not to be hidden and covered up with band-aids!
-JJ
“When we talked about my trauma we focused on what happened, and not how what happened affected me.
They stopped the immediate bleeding but they didn't attempt to heal the wound.” -JJ